_parenting   homeschool

Homeschoolers Tend to Be Withdrawn?

by Andrea Hermitt | More from this Blogger

07 Apr 2007 04:41 AM

I hear or read on a regular basis about how homeschoolers tend to be withdrawn. They are not used to talking with other kids their age. They are clueless when it comes to what is in, or what is out. They have no social skills.

This is just not true. According to the homeschool newsletter, Free Homeschool Stuff, one parent writes,

contrary to what some might think, my children have become LESS withdrawn and more outgoing and confident.

I have seen this in one of my own children. My son is definitely the strong silent type. He generally has nothing to say, especially to people outside of his family. He was this way even when he went to school. In fact, his preschool teacher, more than half way through the year suddenly suggested he should be brought home and not returned until the next year when he could talk. Meanwhile I had asked how he was doing all year, and she said fine. She never mentioned that he had not spoken in class before. She really thought he was unable to speak. Fortunately, as I sat there completely puzzled, he spoke as if on cue. The woman got up and ran over to him all excited as if she had seen a miracle.

As my son got older, he did occasionally let teachers know he was capable of speaking, but also that he was not interested in saying anything. During his fourth grade school year, teasing for unrelated reasons (the fact that his first name was the same as the school name), shut down what little bit of his personality he was showing in school. He stopped talking almost completely, and became sad and withdrawn.

The following year, when we started homeschooling, you could tell that he had relaxed quite a bit, and his depression slowly lifted. That first year, we could tell that with few exceptions he did not want to be around other children, so we gave him the space he needed to choose his friendships. Now that several years have passed, he is much more outgoing than he ever was. He still only talks only when he has something important to say, but lately, he considers a lot more things important. He attends a special program where he has classes with other children. He has no problem debating history, arguing his point for group projects, and making new friends.

My son has certainly become LESS withdrawn and more outgoing and confident since he began homeschooling.

*Have a question about homeschooling? Just ask.

*Want to know more about homeschooling? Start with the 2006 homeschool blog in review!

 
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Learn more about Andrea Hermitt
ahermitt`s avatar

Andrea Hermitt is a native New Yorker currently residing in GA. She has been married for over 16 years and has two teenage children.

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User Comments

Tristi Pinkston (10839) 07 Apr 2007 08:54 PM

My kids will talk the hind legs off anyone they can get to hold still for thirty seconds! And as for myself -- I've never attended public school and yet I'm now a public speaker. Yeah, those homeschoolers just don't know how to interact with other people.

Valorie Delp (49340) 09 Apr 2007 03:23 PM

LOL--mine are totally talkative too!

Nola Redd (7081) 12 Sep 2008 10:42 AM

Mine don't ever shut up. It's a running joke at our house - I tell them I'm going to send them to public school so they can learn to "sit down and be quiet." My daughter is very quiet and withdrawn when she enters new situations, but once she is comfortable, folks are surprised when I remind them that she was shy at first. Of course, I was NOT homeschooled, and was quiet and shy when we entered new situations.

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