Homeschool Questions: What If My Kids Feel Left Out

by Andrea Hermitt | More from this Blogger

03 Apr 2008 05:50 PM

I am really excited about beginning our homeschool journey in the next school year, but our front yard IS the bus stop! I plan to take my kids on a field trip on the first day of school, and do some creative things to make sure they are happy with the decision, but I know that the question of "Why do they go and I don't?" will arise. .... Did you run into this when you began homeschooling? Where there other areas where you would have done things differently?

I do not have first hand experience with kids feeling left out from going to school because my children had been in school and had bad experiences. They were excited and relieved to be able to homeschool. I think one of the things my kids said the first day of school was "I can't believe I am getting away with this."

While my kids were relieved to be homeschooling, I there was a small amount of unspoken sadness about not being with their friends. I did notice them looking at the school busses outside of the window a bit longingly even though they were very verbal about not going to school. The way I ended that sad feeling was far from politically correct. For the first few weeks when the school bus would make its u-turn right in front of our house, I would jokingly say "Suckers!" My kids would laugh and we would go about our day. Of course, this had negative side effects because they began saying it whenever they saw a school bus and I had to tell them that it was not polite... which meant that I was not polite.

I do have friends and acquaintances whose kids began the homeschooling journey kicking and screaming. The way to combat the feeling that they were missing something was to put the kid in an activity that they would never in a million years have time to do if they were homeschooling. This might be ice-skating, gymnastics, bike racing, pageants, local theatre, or perhaps go on twice-weekly field trips to zoos, museums, and the theatre. In other words, distract them with an activity they will love, and they will forget all about longings for school before long.

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Learn more about Andrea Hermitt

Andrea Hermitt is a native New Yorker currently residing in GA. She has been married for over 16 years and has two teenage children.

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deedee1231 (4030) 04 Apr 2008 05:57 AM

The 3 big field trips in the schools my children would attend are the zoo, Science City, and for the older ones a trip to Worlds of Fun (an amusement park) at the end of the school year. So we purchase family memberships to all three and my children get to go to the zoo any time the weather is nice, to Science City any time there is a new exhibit on display, and Worlds of Fun several times over the summer. Combine that with weekly trips to the library, soccer and softball, the park almost every day that is isn't rainy or cold, and I find that is really enough. Sometimes it can almost be hard to fit in anything else like the museum or a special show that comes into town.

Also, when you go to these places at odd times (when most children are in school) you will find other homeschoolers there. Your children will see other children who aren't in "school" and will probably even make friends with some of them.

Andrea Hermitt (5512) 04 Apr 2008 07:34 AM

That sounds like a great plan Deedee!

jeannieisnew (75) 15 Apr 2008 05:17 PM

GREAT ideas! Thank you so much. I started talking just a little bit about it today with my (now) kindergartener. I'm laying off the bigger conversation until the school year is over. I love the idea of getting the family passes. Maybe I'll tell them we are doing family passes instead of back to school supplies and clothes. Yay!